حقیقت محض

this and that

do you believe I have abandoned every thing, every single thing?

but for what?

I do not know!

they backed off

Didn't I say all the universe has been welded together and supports this system?

I saw it, though sometimes I faltered but there was no any tangible change.

However it's good. 

No, wait! It's excellent.

خمینی

Henry Kissinger:

"If we have a religious government, which is what Khomeini did, then they will rely on the power of fundamentalism to begin to be dominant in the Persian Gulf and to turn against Western materialism and to some extent communism."

Boy, oh boy; There is always one.

from 12 Angry Men 1957.

it's getting late

what would you do if you realize you have been under-effect by someone or something that has been a part of your life and now is a fiber of your being?

in 127 Hours the man gets rid of his own ruddy bloody hand. what would you do? you think you got the guts to do the must?

if it is in your brain forget it.

if it is in your heart put it out.

if it is in your body cut and throw it away.

where is it? huh?

honestly, I think this is the thing that drives me.

the thing that controls me, leads me, nourishes me and yet consumes me.

now I can see why Hafez always says pour me a drink.

پر کن پیاله را

repel reins

capitalism nurtures your desire for money to the point at which you willingly do everything in exchange for money.

and vice versa

you are the victor as long as you do not fear the truth.

where am I

I need myself.

سوگند به آغاز

کوه سینای من کجاست؟

lost in autumn

for the first time I'm looking for something which I should like.

time to experience the phrase saying "get down to the brass tacks".

it's unbelievable that I cannot find anything interesting!

am I crazy or really depressed?

here's the thing:

I need to find a professor whose research I like which means I'm interested to do research just like his/hers but I cannot find any area of research which I can pursue interesting!

that's my problem. my little tiny problem.

maybe it's time to change.

should I swerve into psychology direction? which I have a feeling for it.

or, it's just because of depression and when I start study and research in one of computer related fields all these dark atmosphere will be gone!

who knows?

do you think it's time to see a psychiatrist?

?are we open for it

Shall we experience better days.

utopia is just another bedtime story

All right!

That's enough.

Steer this half-wrecked boat out of misery if there is no victory.

is it a good time to kick over all things

After spending years of study and research in computer and data science now I can say I do not like this field.

You can say I'm crazy or stupid, I don't argue with that though I do not accept it. It is impossible for me, now, to convince you other way around.

Only if I were after money or job or anything this field could offer, I would stick to it after graduation but I wasn't and am not.

All right, what should I do?

I would act unreasonably enough, if I loved or believed to achieve something, to make them say:

What shall we do with a drunken sailor early in the morning?